Super 8 fucking blows. Maybe it’s because I’ve been drinking tonight so my judgement is cloudy but hey, I gave this shitfest a chance and it exploded all over the place, staining my walls and making my eyes vomit with this hot mess. It’s like the seasons.
It starts off with a bunch of annoying kids at a funeral because their friend’s mom died or whatever so he’s all bummed out, then it cuts to a few months later right away, which makes me say “wtf, why even show this shit, just skip right to the 4 months later thing”. Anyway, some shit goes down and a train de-rails, the kids scatter and freak out. Train parts all over the place, train station destroyed – all because some idiot drove his pickup onto the track. By the way, the effects in this scene were HORRIBLE. I could see right away the train wasn’t even real, LOL. I mean c’mon, at least make the fucking train real. This way you would make the shit authentic and also employ people in this fucked up economy. But noooooo “let’s use CGI and once again fuck the entire movie industry because we can save $5 by using this computer shit”.
Next thing we know is that some shit is happening like the power lines in the area are missing, the cop car is smashed, and some gas station clerk gets taken away/eaten by some monster. I still don’t know why the fuck this movie is called “Super 8″, maybe it’s because it dropped a “super 8″ dump on the audience, that’s all I can think of.
I watched about 3/4 + of this movie and realized that’s it’s a big steaming pile of Spielberg diarrhea. WTF. This ain’t ET and never will be. Stop trying to impress the audience with ooohs and ahhhhs, who cares? I just want to see something original and not some hot garbage that does nothing but play fuckery with everyone.
Flash forward to the end and this monster thing sucks up a bunch of metal to build some bullshit I guess to fly away to its home planet. Ok, and? Fuck you Super 8, and everyone involved in this shit.
Don’t watch this movie unless you’re insanely retarded and have no common sense at all. No, this doesn’t apply to me because I wasn’t aware of all this shit before I watched it, so now that you’ve been warned, go fuck yourself.
